Thursday, August 7, 2008

Finding My Peace....

I feel like more and more I am praying for PEACE. Peace in my mind, peace in my head and peace in my brain. I know most of you are thinking, well isn't that all kind of the same thing? But for me its not. You can call it split personality's or a crazy woman, I just call it me.
Everything and everyone that I encounter in my life have effected each one of those pieces.

My mind and heart go together. My mind is where my family is (some of them anyway :):) and the friends that have turned into my family. These are the people that I LOVE more than they will ever know, sometimes for reasons that I don't even understand!

My head is where all the everyday people are, the people that you HAVE to deal with and the things you HAVE to do, just because at some point you have to be a grown up and just SUCK IT UP! (I don't like just sucking things up)

My brain is everything else, did I wash this, did I pack that lunch, did I express the importance to them of being a good human being as opposed to be a thug.....my brain is the reason that I rarely sleep through the night, also the fact that my bladder is in need of a makeover :):):):)
Mostly though my BRAIN!!

I would love to have peace in my mind, every minute of everyday. (wouldn't we all) I wish that I didn't feel the need to fix everything, to make everyone feel better, to make the best Red Beans that I can make. But if I didn't then I wouldn't be me......RIGHT?
When my grandfather became really sick, I was talking to my daddy on the phone one day and in his voice I could feel his pain. I needed to see him, I needed to hug him and tell him that no matter what happens in life, I LOVE YOU, I needed to make him laugh with my silly thoughts and comments. I needed to fix him. Of course I know that I can't fix everything or everybody. But it sure doesn't hurt to try!

When I pray for things like this, It's like I can here GOD laughing, going GIRL seriously, YOU, PEACE, CHILD PLEASE!! (Yes in my mind God is apparently an elderly black woman, its my GOD and I can think whatever I want)
I will keep on praying everyday, everyday I know is another chance to give GOD a good laugh and for me to give someone else some peace.....

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